25
Nov
07

F*ck the KNNCCB Ceramah Subur

The title means ‘dawn speech’ in Malay. And this is a religion-bashing rant post, you have been warned. I don’t care if you flame me. Better yet come flame me lah if you like to f*ck donkeys.
I’m a peace loving guy, but I seriously think this way too much to tolerate. Next time when I buy a house, I’m gonna freaking make sure there’s no religious buildings within a mile radius (es-f*cking-specially a mosque!).

So here I am, ranting like a lunatic with my eyes bulging instead of being soundly asleep. Tiu gau nia mah chao hai – lou dao mou lanjiao – kan neh nah chao chee bai – ass f*cking gay b*stard son of a biatch with a maggot-infested rotting face that no mother can love – bapak berkacuk dengan kambing untuk mendapat anak sial tu [your father fucked a goat to get a shitface like you]! F*ck… f*ck… f*ck… f*ck… FAAAAAAARRRRRRK!
This is what happened…

My house is situated right in front of a mosque. Not a small surau kind of thing, but a large, full scale mosque complete with big ass lo-fi speakers all over — like ornaments on a Christmas tree. So I was sleeping soundly at night, as I semi-woke-up to flip and turn at about 6.25am Sunday morning. Then I heard some voice speaking in Malay. Ahh, I thought… the usual dawn prayer from the mosque.

However, it wasn’t a freaking prayer, it was a bloody ceramah. It basically talked about everything. And the chee-bai mouthed ulama/imam/whoever turn the volume all the way up.

So I woke up fuming mad. I went to the living room, thinking perhaps I’m able to avoid the mind-numbing ceramah from the mosque and grab some sleep on the couch . But there’s no escape. My whole house is like a THX-certified Dolby Digital surround system. The ceramah can be heard everywhere in the house, EVERY-F*CKING-WHERE!

For 40+ minutes, the fella just kept ramblin’ on and on and on about some youngsters-avoid-crime-advice shit like an insane heretic. Even my dad sleeping in the master bedroom (front of the house) also cannot tahan the incessant yapping.

Since I’m gonna get a lot of flame for this post, I might as well go all the way.
F*ck you all inconsiderate Muslims! If you can’t respect others, don’t expect others to respect you. You think you’re oh-so-great and above the law in Malaysia you can go round pushing you poke-marked-sumo-sized ass into my face?
I tell you what… Go and f*ck your non-halal pig-faced male-virgins in the nine h*lls hingga kotek kau putus kena hisap syaitan [’til your penis breaks off getting a blowjob from satan]! From now on, I’m treating Muslims in Malaysia as guilty-until-proven-innocent on a with case-by-case encounter.

I got sooooo pissed off that I had to record the ceramah and let you guys listen. It’s a 1-minute mp3 clip, try looping that for 40+ minutes while you try to sleep. You’ll go nuts! (For the original mp3 click here.)

What the f*ck is happening to Malaysia? Have these imams and ulamas no concern for people of other religion (or people who wants to sleep)? These kind of shit never happened for all my life staying in front of that mosque. I hear their prayers all the time and I’m OK with that. I respect that they have to pray. But why in the damned h*ll do they have to turn up the volume, and choose a soprano-pitched f*cktard to give the bloody ceramah at six in the morning for 40+ minutes?!?!?!

The mosques in Malaysia are getting more and more erratic and are wasting so much of people’s money building so many mosques that look like palace. It was after all those Pak Lah’s KNN-lao bu Islam Hadhari shit, and proclaiming Malaysia as an Islamic state that crazy-imbecillic-hypertension-inducing ceramahs like these are becoming a serious nuisance. F*ck you lah, Pak Lah! You spineless hamsap lan-jiao-with-only-a-reptilian-brain who couldn’t manage our country but only cares about f*cking your new wife’s lao-chee-bai down in your 60 million Ringgit Australian home.

In Cantonese we say: giving birth to a piece of char-siew is even more useful than you being born. You are even less halal than a million pieces of char-siew. Even the air you & your f*ckface son-in-law breathes out are non-halal and cursed. I really hope you die in a heart attack when you f*ck (I pity that lao-chee-bai… ~ptooi!)! Same goes for the rest of the UMNO cock-suckers (especially the cheebai-less & lanjiao-less MCA)!

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6 Responses to “F*ck the KNNCCB Ceramah Subur”


  1. November 26, 2007 at 2:12 pm

    Whoa can record somemore, that must be real loud dy.. Maybe u should’ve just sneaked into the mosque n cut off their speaker wire or something..

  2. November 26, 2007 at 3:17 pm

    If I’m as good as Jason Bourne… I’d defintely do that! =)

  3. 3 tiputipu
    November 26, 2007 at 5:42 pm

    Dont use the F word in from of the KIDS you teach.OK

  4. November 27, 2007 at 11:54 pm

    =P Ooops.

    No I don’t do it in front of them. But some how, they’ve learned it from somewhere else. You’d be surprise the variety of foul language those kids pick up.
    I smack them and give them a lecture whenever I hear them swear.

  5. 5 lly
    December 9, 2007 at 6:25 am

    There’s a mosque just a few blocks away from my house back in Malaysia… so, I can understand that.. they really spend too much time at mosque! esp during fasting month!! how i wish i can bomb the mosque off, haha!
    and.. yes.. we can hear it if there’s ceramah..
    I’ve even heard once.. sth like “jangan beli barang dengan cina”!!!

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