I’m Back

Woooo! Work in HZ ended and I’m back to KL.
Home sweet home.

In Arnold’s The Terminator voice:
“I’m baaack!”

Found… dead or un-alive

This morning, while taking my bath a morbid thought flashed through my head.

There’s a electrical socket in my bathroom, where the water heater is plugged into. When the heater is operating, if I turn off the switch… there would be a spark in the switch. It’s pretty scary, considering that the bathroom (and sometimes my fingers too) is damp and wet.

Death from electrocution is a very real risk.

Then *THE FLASH* came. You know, like in some comedies or cartoons when the heavens decide to shower the character with blessings and flood them with the sun’s ray shining through the clouds to create a Jesus light effect. Wooooo!

Yeah, that’s what happened to me, except that it’s not exactly a comforting thought.

In the very sad (or happy, depending on how much you hate me) event that I get electrocuted in my bathroom… I wonder how long would it take for someone to actually finally find out that my dead body has been decaying? Or who would be the first to figure out I’m dead?

My colleagues certainly wouldn’t call to check out on me, because they would assume that I’ve gone to the retail shop to help out. Probably 10 days before they realise I’m missing.

My bosses would certainly not be the first. They wouldn’t even know where am I, much less care.

My parents would find out 1-2 months later, because that’s how often they call me.

My social circles in HZ would find out 3-4 months later, probably in the news… or from gossips. And I’d probably be the first dead HZ Hash House Harrier, and turn into a legend of some sort.

My buddies would only notice something wrong 3-4 weeks later when there’s no Facebook updates or MSN logins.

My neighbour would probably find out 1 week later when I’m decomposing… giving off a foul decaying smell.

I don’t have a girlfriend to speak of, and even if I have one… she might finally figure out that I’m dead probably 3-4 days later.

This is so fxcking sad.

Han Chinese? Chinese Malaysian? Malaysian Chinese?

A little update on the Malaysian Chinese? Chinese Malaysian? post.

A week ago, I went for a jogging session. The last time I ran seriously was 4-5 years ago. So as for whatever is left of my paltry stamina, I hope I don’t faint and fall into the West Lake.

After the run (took me 1 hour to complete a miserable 5k), I sat down with the runners + hashers and tokok. There’s this Chinese (Han) looking dude with an American accent. I eventually found out that his family migrated to USA when he was very young.

Half way talking he was curious that I’m a Malaysian, but with a Chinese (Han) face, and a weird accent (yes, we Malaysians have an accent).

So he asked me what am I. And so I replied him that I’m a Malaysian, but my of Chinese ethnicity.

Then he started off with his rant about how the term Chinese is actually a fairly recent word. It was created by one Chinese leader of the recent past (couldn’t remember: Chiang Kai Shek? Sun Yat Sen? ).

The actual meaning of the word ‘Chinese’ is to define the people under the rule of China. It was brought about to unite the people of China by using a common term/word.

Therefore, he continues, the word Chinese does carry any reference of race or ethnicity. It is supposed to be a identity of the people (emotionally, culturally, nationally) attached to the country China. And for this reason alone, I should not be saying that I’m a Chinese… or that my ethnicity is Chinese.

An example he gave me is that: the people in Xinjiang are Chinese, because Xinjiang is part of China. But their race/ethnicity is Uighur. And the same goes for many other minority race (少数民族) in China and Taiwan.
(If I may add: technically, we should be calling them Uighur Chinese.)

The correct way of indicating my ethnicity is to call myself a ‘Han 汉’ instead. Because the word ‘Han 汉’ is the only word use to identify the ‘Han’ people — 汉族.

And I fully agree with him. In fact, when I tell the gwailos that I’m Malaysian… they later follow up with another question: “You look like the Chinese people.” Then they fumble a little before finally asking in a very subtle + polite + politically-correct manner, “I mean, are you Han? As in does your ancestry trace back to China?”

I was often surprised by this reference of ‘Han’, and I’ll reply, “Yeah, my ancestors came from China.” Now I know where did that curiosity came from.

Perhaps I should add this line when I answer the same question in the future, “I guess you could call me a Han Malaysian if you like. But I would prefer that you just call me a Malaysian.”

Yours Patriotically,
theMAlaysian

iamyuanwu’s routine 1

Yesterday, I did a weird sh!t routine that I composed myself.
Does the exercise routine make any sense at all? No it doesn’t.
So why still do it? Because I love these exercises. And that’s all the motivation I needed for yesterday!

The usual warm up:

15sec of each: skipping on the spot (with high knee), jumping jacks, running on the spot, jumping side to side, pushups, crunches, mountain climber, burpees.
According to a research from West Point (no.1 US military school), this warm up can help trainees run faster and jump higher. And I find it a quick way to get my temperature.

4-5 minutes of simple mobility drills e.g. leg swings, arm circles, loosening up the muscles and joints.

5-10 vertical jumps.
I found out that [max effort] jumping or sprinting spikes up my nervous system. There was once, I was so lethargic I actually napped for 10 minutes in the gym before I started training. And became totally groggy. After a few jumps, I’m hyped up, and ready to go!

Here’s the routine. Most are done with 90-120s rest.

1) (push) Inclined DB press –> 13kg, 2×20, 4min rest
2) (legs) Bulgarian split squat –> 35kg bar, 2×10 [fried my legs too soon]
3) (pull) Chin up + face pull super set –> 2x max chin ups + 2lbs 2×10
4) (legs) Pistols –> 1×10 [I feel that I might puke if I did an extra set]
5) (shoulder) Alternating DB upright row –> 13kg 2×10
6) (a$$) Single arm DB swings –> 13kg 2×10 [for the last few reps, my abs were getting sore & my form was getting sloppy]
7) (pull) Self supported DB rows –> 13kg 2×10
8) (a$$) DB snatch –> 13kg 2×10
9) (abs+shoulder) Turkish get-up –> 13kg 2×2 [my grip was giving up from all those DB power movements]
10) (abs) Plank –> 10kg plate, 40sec

(notice that with the exception of 1 & 3, all exercise involves the abs)

It took me approximately 80 minutes to complete. It was actually pretty tough. My heart rate never dropped even with 90s rest between sets. And I’m continuously panting and sucking air. And the weirdest thing is I had a side stitch for a while (those pain on the side when jogging or running). LOL!

After taking a shower, I noticed that I’m in a surprisingly good mood. And I feel refreshed. Like a runners/cardio high!
I’m putting this routine into my permanent programme! Whoever is crazy enough, do try it out too!

Yours Strongly,
theBOdybuilder.

P.S. while doing the swings, a dude came over and asked me if I practise Sanda (散打chinese kickboxing). Hah hah! Objective tercapai. I’m looking forward to a fighter’s physique.

Currency War

I’m currently reading a book titled Currency Wars 货币战争 by 宋鸿兵 Song Hongbing. A bit of history into how our current financial system came about sent me some chills. It’s a totally messed up system, and normal people like you and me are those that are AFFECTED MOST by this system.
I’ve just finished chapter 1. I can’t read Chinese fast, so can’t blame me for the turtle speed of my progress. LOL!
Will talk about it more as I read the book.

I.am.inadequate

I can’t help but feel that bad mouthing another person is… a deep sense of inadequacy and a symptom of inferiority complex.

I’ve been talking bad about a high school student I used to teach recently. There has been no progress on his part for months on end. I couldn’t figure out what is preventing him from progressing. So I often attribute it to him being 心不在课室里 (the heart was not in the class).

But it’s not entirely his fault. A bad student is a the result of a bad teacher. The Chinese 三字经 has a famous saying: 养不教、父之过，教不严、师之惰. Loosely translated as: raising a child without proper guidance is the parents’ fault; teaching without discipline and producing results, is due to the teacher being lazy.

Now that I’m ‘fired’, I’m not sure I should be happy or disappointed. Disappointed that I’ve not done a good job teaching, but happy that I don’t have to endure the frustration of teaching someone with a skull infused with adamantium (you’d get this satire if you are a fan of X-Men/Wolverine). <— See, here I go bad-mouthing him again. =P

I think it's time for me to leave, since now that I'm practically a super useless accessory here. Who's interested in learning the Maori war chant in NZ with me, aye?

theTUtor

General Strength Training for Futsal

Note: it’s still under construction and refinement. I will furnish it with more links, references & videos… when I have to luxury to bypass the Great Firewall. =)

This strength training programme is adapted from Westside for Skinny Bastards-part 3 (W4SB) by Joe DeFranco. I’ve made some adjustments for futsal players. If you feel gratitious to me, please buy me lunch. X^D

I met this dude in Lowyat.net forum, and he was asking for help to train for his futsal competition, which was already on going at that time. A bit too late to train for strength and stamina. But still, he would be able to see some improvements by the end of the league (which is 6 weeks).

Oh, no one has tried it yet. So whoever who does it will be the first guinea pig. Please post your results here.

Kungfu competitions on Chinese TV

I was at the gym when I ’saw’ the show. Each episode, 2 kungfu schools are invited, typically with different kungfu styles. Then the show put the fighters into respective weight class and let them slog it out.

I wasn’t impressed at all.

I probably watched too much of Hong Kong kungfu/fighting movies. I was expecting something more polished and smooth, and gritty… something like Fight Quest when they learned Sanda.

Instead, what I saw was the typical kungfu pose before the engagement. Then when they engage in a fight, it looked like a hybrid of judo plus boxing plus kicking. Sure, there are a few signature moves once in a while. But nothing interesting.

Each bout was quick. Within 3-4 moves, one fella is down and point is given. The fighter then would have to stand up and reset the fight. This probably indicate the effectiveness of kungfu. If you’re good, you can take down an enemy within 3-4 moves.

My point is, I couldn’t feel any ‘kick’ from watching. In fact, it was boring as hell. And the fights weren’t fought in close distance. The fighters were standing far away. I wonder if it would be effective in a train or roadside where space is small. Close quarter fighting is totally different. And I wonder if kungfu would work when dealing with street fighting and self-defence.

If you want to learn how to defend yourself on the streets, I guess the best bet would be Kajukenbo of US, Krav Maga of Israel, and bodybuilding (no one ever dares to mess with a big guy). I would like to pick up kajukenbo (savate and taichi too), it’s ghetto and gritty. And they literally do street fights. This is as underground and ghetto as it gets.

Dead in MACC

Teoh Beng Hock. Murdered. The government did it. The BN government did it.

This would fit nicely in a crime/detective novel, or in season 5 of Prison Break, or it could even be made into Die Hard 5.0: The MACC Conspiracy. The producer can even claim it as a reality show.

Real sad lah, the poor lad. He was supposed to be married the next day. Now he’s dead. And a horrible death at that. What has become of Malaysia? I thought the Malays were supposed to be peace loving people as they claim to be. I guess the peace loving side has been replaced by the devil. These people are not Malay. They are not humans to begin with.

I can only hope that Teoh’s family will learn to cope with his death as time passes. And that they can find some comfort that many Malaysians mourn his death.

Click these 2 links and read the report and commentary. The conspiracy has just ceased to become a conspiracy.

http://mt.m2day.org/2008/content/view/24426/84/

http://www.themalaysianinsider.com/index.php/malaysia/32490-ean-yongs-political-secretary-dead-at-macc-hq-

Zhang Ziyi was stalking me!

After a nice gym session and a happy dinner alone in one fine evening… I cycled back to my bachelor pad, looking forward to a nice cool shower. As I opened the door, I felt something was not quite right in my apartment.

The room was dark. The air was stale. The red obstacle lights on top of the opposite apartment pulsing like the heartbeat of a dying Ultraman. The dim moonlight was shining it’s ethereal lights through the long and heavy curtains, creating weird silhouettes across the room.

My pupils dilated as my eyes adjusted to the darkness. I entered the room. And my hand instinctively felt around the wall to look for the switch. 

Suddenly, I felt a chill. As if someone was watching. I turned right and tried to look into the darkness. My heartbeat raced and I could feel a surge of adrenaline rushing through my veins.

And there amongst the shadows and moonlight, is a face. Or something that resembles a face. It wasn’t clear, but I could recognise the eyes, staring straight at me. Eyes that I will remember for a long long time.

Eyes that I had remembered.